Black Betsy

Child Abuse

Thought provoking and funny enough to share. I, of course, am the least funny of the three:

From: Jule
09/22/2004 11:34 AM
To: Brad, Chris
Subject: Passing the Torch

Yesterday morning at breakfast, I told Thomas that the Eagles won Monday
night. His response? "Yeah, but the Phillies lost." Of course, they
didn't even play, and he would have no way of knowing if they did, but
he has fully begun his journey into Phillies fandom. What have I done?

From: Chris
09/22/2004 11:35 AM
To: Jule
cc: Brad
Subject:Re: Passing the Torch

I think raising a child to be a White Sox or Phillies fan is child abuse.

From: Brad
09/22/2004 11:49 AM
To: Chris
cc: Jule
Subject:Re: Passing the Torch

Child abuse: Cubs, Red Sox, White Sox, Phillies, Astros.
Making sure your child sets no goals for himself whatsoever: Brewers, Pirates, Devil Rays, Royals
Making sure your child has a reach sense of history but feels like a loser: Tigers, Reds, Indians
Making sure your child vastly overpays for things and has no sense of value: Mets, Orioles, Dodgers, Rangers
Turning your child into a spoiled brat: Yankees, Braves
Making your child an outcast with no support network: Expos, Blue Jays
Making your child frugal, but subject to a glass ceiling: Twins, A's
Making your child depend on one person his whole life: Giants
Teaching your child to throw out his best toys: Mariners, Diamondbacks, Marlins
Giving your child a sense of personal space: Rockies
Leaving a child with only the Cardinals, Padres and Angels to choose from. And who wants that??

From: Jule
09/22/2004 12:36 PM
To: Brad, Chris
Subject:Re: Passing the Torch

LOL. For the Cardinals: Making your child into a rational, moderate,
non-cynical person who respects tradition but is so boring he thinks two
Budweisers is a radical good time.